Social Distancing and the Bully

Social distancing is a unique situation that might reduce bully-type behaviors from individuals who may prey on the marginalized. Without an audience or the rewards found in social groups, the bully may seek other ways to satisfy their unhealthy unmet needs and drives. However, there are bully personalities who thrive on microaggression and covert methods to maintain an imbalance of power when separated from their target. When individuals are advised to practice social distancing, the bystander becomes essential as they can be the protective shield from bully-type behaviors by using the approved distance communication methods to stay in touch with those who are quarantined or practicing social distancing. The bystander might be a neighbor, family member, coworker, or other agency helpers who can listen, advise, and report the abuse of the marginalized in isolation.

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Hoarding and Bullying during the COVID-19 Pandemic

The hoarding behaviors that are occurring over the fear of the COVID-19 pandemic may not be a form of bullying. If a person already has bully-type responses, then hoarding behaviors may be an extension of their personality and embedded personality disorders. However, hoarding during times of extreme stress and fear is a normal human response because humans have individual comfort and survival needs. If these needs remain unmet for some time, the flight or fight response is activated and induces panic and unhealthy responses. Hoarding is a type of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), and hoarding as a fear response to the COVID-19 crisis falls into this category because of the anxiety associated with a critical event, and the mental distress of the unknown and the future course of the pandemic. Hoarding is a form of self-medication because it is the individual's way of coping with the stress of the pandemic. 

Because there are adverse outcomes concerning hoarding in this situation, such as guilt, untreated anxiety disorder, increased fears, the increasing concern of unmet needs, and the lack that it may create for others, treatment is essential. It is necessary to realize and identify the psychological reasons behind unhealthy drives and motives so that rational decision-making and healthier responses to the COVID-19 pandemic may result.  Humans need to gather the necessary supplies in a sensible way to survive any crisis; however, it is also critical to foster humankind's survival and the greater good.

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Finding a Hero Within the Bully Triad

Within the unhealthy educational or workplace culture, there are abundant opportunities for positive change; however, it will not happen without an educational intervention. The bully, the victim, and the bystander have one of the most unhealthy social connections known to man. This bully triad will repeat the unhealthy alliance until an interruption in the cycle allows triad members to step out of the dynamic and become heroes. Dr. Zimbardo, known for his work on the psychology of evil, has recently turned his research focus to how people can turn daily challenges into opportunities for everyday heroism. For some, the heroism will be those who teach about the difference between good and evil; for others, it will be the policy change agents, some will be the protectors of values, and others will stand with the marginalized. 

Dr. Stewart

Bullying and Moral Injury

The bully triad consists of the bully, the bystander, and the victim. When bullying occurs, the toxic relationship between members creates moral injury. Moral injury occurs in individuals and groups when forced participation of events occurs either through active or passive means, where the violation of member values and beliefs or spirituality are disrespected and reduces the meaning and significance of life. Moral injury for the bully triad members creates feelings of emotional guilt and shame, betrayal, and cognitive dissonance. Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), suicidal ideation, bullying, and victims of war, abuse, rape, and trauma all have a causal link to moral injury, which makes treatment and recovery difficult.  

Contact PYS for Consulting and Courses on Bully Prevention

Dr. Stewart 

pictureyourselfstronger@yahoo.com

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Create a Bully-Free Cost Structure

The bully-free cost structure is an abstract concept that is often buried within other budgets and attended to only in crisis. A bullying management and prevention program requires a specific budget to support continuous improvement in organizational culture, communities, and home environments. For example, outdated policies and procedures may need to be rewritten, and employee assistance programs implemented, and funds reserved for personal counseling as needed. However, don't overlook the shared and free resources in the community that might provide substantial support and shelter.

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Identify Unmet Needs

Individuals who have self-actualized are less likely to become bullies because they have achieved their highest needs. Self-actualization is a state of congruence between the real and the ideal self. Any disequilibrium between the real and the ideal self creates actual or perceived unmet needs, which are often drivers for bully-type behaviors. Therefore, the first step in bullying prevention is to identify the unmet needs of the individual, community, group, organization, or educational setting. 

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